Note of the Day 02.09.17
This Sweet and Unbearable Softness
This very early morning my beloved left for a month. Partly to walk his Camino in the north of Spain. Find his way.
Staying here in my everyday surroundings I choose to do the same. Walk MY Path. Find my hearts way through a Vision Quest in every day taking a new step out of habit - into the unknown.
And every day maybe sin a little new sin too. Today this sin was a piece of homemade mint chocolate cake from the open day market at the community Hertha which I visited for the first time.
A home for people with a imprint such as Downs Syndrome living together with people with the imprint ‘someone near normal' I did think I would feel kind of home there and maybe I did. But the inspiration this time didn't come from these well known Angel beings of the planet - but from a young man playing the guitar, singing his own songs in the corner of the small cafe set up for the day.
With a somehow thin voice he explained the background of this song - the only one I heard sitting outside on a bale of hay - looking down over the hilly fields. He said something like - maybe you too at times have had the thought that there is no reel space for you in the world. That when you sit in a corner and just goes inside yourself you are of no use! This song is for you! And with his soft penetrating voice he began to sing
- something like: no matter how little impact you feel you have.
No matter how few people really see you As your are. No matter what. You DO have a place in the world. The world needs - just you as you are.
And as I received it in my heart - the words and the tones of the chorus announced something like:
Your Heart is telling Its story.No matter what. THAT has an importance in the world. And this boy - soon to become a man - made my heart melt. Right there in the Sun on the bale of hay. - I came back to a place inside of me. Long longed for.
This place of making space for the unbearable softness we all probably carry underneath our shell. - I found it to lead me directly HOME – into my capability to carry this bearable softness – not to be altered, but to be lived.
Thank you young man. Whoever you are. By ending your sharing of songs with a : this must be it. I need to go pee now.
You a normal young man - put the arrow - this way -> for me.
Thank you ❤️
- and what a great 1. day of MY Camino that started maybe half a century ago.